Some jokes in english

[Huiono]

Hahaha...
Very nice Jokes...
I can't stop laugh... especially about that Singlish+Hokien thingy...
Keep posting okay...

[Lex Chan]

[rista]

so funny..
very very funny....

[jamescoa]

An Immigration Officer (IO) asked to Korean refugee (KR), "Your name, please..."

KR: PAK YU.

IO: f**k you, I said give me your full name!!

KR: PAK YU TU..

[Forte]

[Huiono]

  

[mushroom_kick]

 

[Lex Chan]

Boy: Are you free tonight?
Girl: Sorry, I am expensive..

[Lex Chan]

"Yeah right! I carried this stuff through two subways,
three airport terminals and four parking lots -
now I'm going to pay you 10 bucks to put it in the elevator!"

[Lex Chan]

[harta]

Car Names

AUDI : Another Ugly Deutsche Invention

BMW : Brings Me Women but Broke My Wallet

FIAT : Failure in Italian Automotive Technology

FORD : Fast Only Rolling Downhill

HYUNDAI : Hope You Understand Nothing's Driveable and Inexpensive

SAAB : Shape Appears Ass-Backwards

SUBARU : Screwed Up Beyond All Repair Usually

VOLVO : Very Odd Looking Vehicular Object

PORSCHE : Proof Of Rich Spoiled Children Having Everything

[harta]

Name to Avoid For Your Kids :

1) Anne Chang (in Mandarin) - Dirty

2) Anne Chin (in Mandarin) - Keep quiet

3) Carl Chng (in Hokkein) Buttock

4) Carmen Teng (in Hokkein) - Leg hair long

5) Corrine Tai (in Hokkein) - Poor fellow

6) Faye Chen (in Mandarin) Dusty

7) Henry Mah (in Mandarin) - Hate your mum

Henry Tan (in Hokkein) - Let you wait

9) Jane Tan (in Mandarin) - Fried egg

10) Judy Soo (in Mandarin) - Fated to lose.

11) Leslie Tong (in Mandarin) - Rubbish bin

12) Lucy Liaw (in Hokkein) - You are dead

13) Michael Tan (in Cantonese) - Selling eggs

14) Monica Cheng (in Hokkein) - Touch your buttock

15) Nelson Chong (in Mandarin) - Worms-infested bird

16) Nelson Tan (in Mandarin) - Bird laying eggs

17) Paul Chan (in Cantonese) - Bankrupt

18) Suzie Leow (in Hokkein) - Lost till death 

[Forte]

Name to Avoid For Your Kids :

1) Anne Chang (in Mandarin) - Dirty

2) Anne Chin (in Mandarin) - Keep quiet

3) Carl Chng (in Hokkein) Buttock

4) Carmen Teng (in Hokkein) - Leg hair long

5) Corrine Tai (in Hokkein) - Poor fellow

6) Faye Chen (in Mandarin) Dusty

7) Henry Mah (in Mandarin) - Hate your mum

Henry Tan (in Hokkein) - Let you wait

9) Jane Tan (in Mandarin) - Fried egg

10) Judy Soo (in Mandarin) - Fated to lose.

11) Leslie Tong (in Mandarin) - Rubbish bin

12) Lucy Liaw (in Hokkein) - You are dead

13) Michael Tan (in Cantonese) - Selling eggs

14) Monica Cheng (in Hokkein) - Touch your buttock

15) Nelson Chong (in Mandarin) - Worms-infested bird

16) Nelson Tan (in Mandarin) - Bird laying eggs

17) Paul Chan (in Cantonese) - Bankrupt

18) Suzie Leow (in Hokkein) - Lost till death 

[Hikoza83]

Chinese Names - Annie Wan(Anyone)  [A joke]

Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?

Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!

Operator: You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Caller: I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent.

Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no
one) as involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one) got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.

Operator: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!

Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator: I'm Saw Lee (Sorry).

Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!

[mushroom_kick]

Chinese Names - Annie Wan(Anyone)  [A joke]

Caller : Hello, can I speak to Annie Wan (anyone)?

Operator : Yes, you can speak to me.

Caller: No, I want to speak to Annie Wan (anyone)!

Operator: You are talking to someone! Who is this?

Caller: I'm Sam Wan (Someone). And I need to talk to Annie Wan (anyone)! It's urgent.

Operator: I know you are someone and you want to talk to anyone! But what's this urgent matter about?

Caller: Well... just tell my sister Annie Wan (anyone) that our brother Noel Wan (no
one) as involved in an accident. Noel Wan (no one) got injured and now Noel Wan (no one) is being sent to the hospital. Right now, Avery Wan (everyone) is on his way to the hospital.

Operator: Look if no one was injured and no one was sent to the hospital, then the accident isn't an urgent matter! You may find this hilarious but I don't have time for this!

Caller: You are so rude! Who are you?

Operator: I'm Saw Lee (Sorry).

Caller: Yes! You should be sorry. Now give me your name!!